5 Things I Learned from George

As you know by now, a lot of my learning, training, discussing comes over a meal.  While having lunch with George, a small group leader who started a group last spring, I learned five things.

We were discussing the community that exists in his group and all the individuals in the group.  He knew each of their ‘storys’ and the potential that each one possessed.  Life issues kept some from ‘perfect attendance’ or taking turns leading the group.  Family situations prevented others from hosting or serving on a project at this time.  But he KNEW each person’s situation.

After we completed the discussion of each family, we moved on to: “What’s next?”  He quickly explained how they had taken the Small Group/Disciple’s Health Survey and discovered their weakness was in the disciple’s characteristic of ‘Influence.’  He had picked a resource for the group and calendared with members the dates of their next four gatherings.

This led them to a service project as a group which led some of the group to participate in a missions experience in Haiti.  Group members either went on the experience, were prayer warriors for the experience, collected supplies and gifts, provided rides to/from airport and even served as dog-sitters for the week.  Upon returning from the experience the group gathered and shared what God had done through their availability and unity as a small group.

George then shared about who he saw stepping up as potential leaders.  He then asked for ideas on how to develop his apprentice and we discussed next steps for his already well thought out plans.

Here are some of the things which we could all learn from George:

1.  He had a heart for people. He really wanted to see his SG members be more like Christ next year than today.

2. He knew how to pray for his SG members.  Because he spent time with people and listened.

3.  He knew the characteristics of a Disciple (survey). How can I pray for each person and their Christ-likeness?

4. He knew the activities that could help them move on their spiritual journey.  Activities, Mission experiences and how to involve the entire group in a project or experience.

5. He knew who to spend extra time with for future leaders.  And then developed a plan for the next 8 months.

You too may learn some things from George.  Be sure to share your stories with others to help them grow.

Leader Plans for Fall 2012

What is your 2012 plan for your family?  For your career?  For your home?  For your Small Group?

I realize it is January 3, 2012, but the fall is coming.  Fall is a natural growth time for people’s lives, families and careers.  Most of us don’t even think that far ahead, much less plan that far ahead.  Our family has a list of “would you rathers…?” which list all the things we need to fix, buy, do or visit in 2012.  We discussed as a family which ones are needs, priorities or just fun things we want to do in the coming year.  We laughed, argued, debated and even strategized how to accomplish what we would like to see happen in 2012.  I know what your thinking…Eddie made his family do that?  Yea, I am a little OCD.    But life takes planning…plus I have a high school senior living at my house.

I discovered others plan ahead also.  While having lunch with a Small Group Leader I heard how he had conducted the Small Group Health Survey with his group.  The results helped him know what studies to choose and how to lead the group toward their next step on the Christ Centered Journey.

He has a plan for each potential leader and for each person in his group to help them grow in their relationship with Christ and, at the same time, ask them to help him grow on his journey.

The survey and journey have led him to review the curriculum guide and choose studies that will challenge he and his group in the coming year.  Then for the fall he is planning for his community and several new families to be influenced by his group through service (members using their gifts), through invitation (members will be praying for friends and family through the spring) through new groups (members step out to be leaders in fall campaign) through generosity (group will be sponsoring projects/trips in fall).

What plans do you have for your family? For your career? For your small group?  Now is the time to look into 2012 and discover where God is leading.

5 Steps to Grow Your Group by August

“My group is excited about growing in Christ.  I have 3 apprentice couples in my group who lead on a rotation basis.” As we talked he explained that, based on the Disciple’s Health Survey, his group was really weak on what LifePoint calls “Influence” toward their unconnected/unchurched friends.  Influence means investing time and prayer in your friends, neighbors and co-workers and letting our relationship with Jesus become part of the conversations often.

How can you increase the intentionality of your group on influence?  Here is an 8 month plan we put together to grow and/or start another small group.

1. Prayer time:  Ask your group often about their relationships with the unchurched. We suggest mentioning names or situations during prayer time in each small group gathering.  This will keep the important subject in the minds of your group, as well as give your group a chance to celebrate what God is doing in and through the lives of group members and friends. (Start January 8th)

2. Throw a party:  one of the clear expectations for every group is to have a party every month.  If you are in the on-campus/Sunday School model, this is called the monthly social.  I have watched my parents for 30 years use this event to grow the community in their class.  Move beyond just the community in your group by once a quarter focusing this party on your friends who are far from Christ.  They get to see your group in a casual atmosphere and having discussions about real life issues. (Super Bowl Feb 5?)

3. Summer time outings: Summer time gives you more opportunities to do life together.  As you plan your monthly parties in June, July and August, remember to invite your friends to build more community with the group in preparation for the fall campaign. (Ice Cream, boat outings, cookouts)

4. Invite to Campaign:  Each couple should invite one or two couples to the 4, 6 or 8 week church-wide campaign in the fall.  Some people become very hesitant at this point because the new couples may not be church attendees.  This is not about church attendance at this point, your focus is to build a relationship with them and connect them to other Christ-followers.  Church attendance will eventually come as God continues to work in their lives.  Let the couples know this is a short campaign, at the end of which they can decide if they would like to continue or not.

5. Start new groups:  If all the couples decide to continue with small group, consider starting a new small group or two.  The group in this illustration will be apprenticing 2 couples and 2 co-leaders from January to August.  If the group feels they are too large to experience quality community or cannot subgroup in the same house, then they will be ready to launch out with new groups.

You have 3 weeks to get ready for a new year.  What effort will you give toward growing your group?

Small Group, You’re Fired!

I’ve unfortunately heard of groups exploding, dissolving or quitting.  But never have I heard of a smal group leader actually firing his group, until Wednesday.

It had been a long 6 months of mediocre commitment from the group members. Frustration mounted as he and his wife would try to encourage LifePoint’s principle of “share the load”  Getting different members to prepare food, design a menu, host the group meeting or even lead an up coming meeting was impossible.

The frustration mounted to the point that he became creative in his attempted solutions for this lack of commitment: he and his wife agreed to ‘fire’ the entire group… then offer to start a new group with clear expectations and agree on each person’s responsiblity.
The group of six couples is now a group of five couples, three of them serve as apprentices, all share the load of leading a week, hosting a week and preparing a meal for the group. These responsibilities only come around once every five weeks…and they love it. The group is united!

A covenant, read thru and agreed upon, at the very beginning of the group can help minimize these issues in many cases. However, sometimes we have to resort to tough-love options when the issue continues.

Take it from this group leader, getting serious about making disciples is not easy.  But in the end, this one grew people more in one serious small group meeting than in the 6 months prior. Clarify the purpose and responsibilities of your group!  Here is a sample covenant that might help you.

 

Are You Average or Above Average?

If you are like the average leader in business, church, small group or sports, you want to excel. Your work hard.  You deal daily with issues and check off your to-do list before heading home each day.  But what sets the above average leader apart is a plan.  A plan keeps the goal in focus, you know where you are going and can evaluate your progress often.  As you evaluate you have the opportunity to tweak the plan and move forward toward the goal.

Above average leaders write their plan along with their team.  They include them in evaluation of current reality.  They look to the future and cast vision for where they want to be over time. They create a winning culture and hold each other accountable.

Average leaders plan for the future, but do not evaluate those plans on a regular basis.  They move on to the next fun or current thing and forget about the yearly plan.  They may write the goal down somewhere but don’t take time to evaluate their progress.  Average leaders do not see the big plans through, they jump to the next best seller or buzz word/activity.  Do you see things through or do you jump to the newest idea before you yearly plan comes to fruition?

The challenge for each of us to rise above the average leader is to identify the “big rocks,” the” big goals” for our work for the next 12 months.  This is the list of four or five things that you need to accomplish in your work.  Write a plan on how to accomplish them.  Then calendar your review times for the year NOW!  Do not let anything take precedence over the importance of reviewing and evaluating your progress. Celebrate the wins and tweak the plan in order to move forward.

Decide today to become an above average leader.

6 Reasons for Your Friends to Connect to a Group?

You have been praying for your unconnected friends and neighbors.  You worry about the spiritual condition of those around you.  You have found the security that comes from being in a Small Group and you want others to experience this same thing. Here are six reasons that you can discuss with your friends and neighbors on why they should be in a small group:

1. Understand the Bible better through group discussion as you apply the Bible to your own personal situations.
2. Develop close relationships with other believers who will walk beside you in your journey as a Christ follower.
3. Find answers to the needs in your life through group prayer.
4. Get support in times of crisis or major changes from people who really care for you.
5. Demonstrate to your lost friends the love of Christ in a non-church setting.
6. Move from being a spectator to a participant by using your gifts and talents as you serve others.

Help for Coaches

Among the many ‘movers and shakers’ in the Small Groups world are a couple of friends who have had a major influence in my life and ministry.  These two guys were among the first authors I read on the subject of Small Groups.  But somehow I missed a valuable resource for Small Group Ministry which they wrote, Coaching Life-Changing Small Groups, by Bill Donahue & Greg Bowman.  Thanks guys for sharing from your experiences and expertise.

Here is the first of many practical helps for Coaches:

A Coach’s Key Practices:

1. Modeling: pursue Christ-likeness.   Pulling from 1 Cor. 4:16 & 11:1 …imitate Christ.  To do that you must spend time with him, get to know him, and know his desires. Don’t downplay the effect your life and example can have on others.

2. Guiding: Shepherd intentionally.  Small Group leaders are usually self-starters and self-sustainers, but what they need is a guide.  Through building a relationship with leaders and listening to them Coaches gain the right to be heard and partner in the growth of the group.

3. Envisioning: Dream together. Having a clear vision will affect your interaction with your leaders.  Help leaders dream about their group.

4. Equipping: Developing skills.  Leaders actually follow a Coach who is  modeling a surrendered life, who shepherds their spiritual development and provides vision. Only after they see these elements are they open to skill development.

These are only a few of the practical nuggets found in Coaching Life-Changing Small Groups.  I think we will be using it a lot more in the near future.  Hope you have a chance to check it out.

What I Learned at Leadership Community

Leadership Community is an event, a meeting, a training experience we borrowed from Exponential and the guys at Community Christian Church.  It is basically an evening living out what Carl George calls VHS, Vision Huddle Skill for all leaders of LifePoint Church.
We met for 30 minutes with our Pastor casting Vision to everyone. (this particular meeting was on ‘making disciples’). Next was 30 minutes by division for Huddle time with Coaches and Leaders discussing ministry issues as well as how are we going to carry out the vision that was just cast.  Finally the Skill time gave the divisional leaders a chance to speak in detail on how they were going to accomplish the vision.

Our feedback forms gave me a chance to see if other leaders were as excited about this event as I was.  Well, they surpassed my expectations.  With nearly 100 adult small group leaders attending, the number one feedback comment was ‘next time I would like more time with my coach.’

I learned that Carl George has a great handle on leader development.  His coaching for us was a reminder that “the secret of engaging adult learners is to find out what they want to do better and offering to show them how.”

I learned that Leaders want to be led and don’t mind the meeting if beneficial for them.   I learned that the Coaching time discussing as a huddle not only what we are trying to accomplish, but how, was much-needed and much wanted. I learned we need to offer more opportunities and better enable our Coaches huddle opportunities for leaders.  And I learned that leaders will respond to a clear and compelling vision of apprenticing.

What is the compelling vision you and your team have cast for your leaders?  What can you do to help leaders discover how to accomplish ‘what they want to do better’?

The Importance of First Impressions

Poor first impressions can cost your organization a lot.  In this case it might have cost this organization several thousand dollars a year.

Recently I  participated in a College Fair with my son Graham.  Over 50 colleges were represented, but we had narrowed our list down to the top five schools with whom we wanted to talk.  As we made our way from table to table we were greeted with enthusiasm as admissions counselors promoted their school.  I watched as student after student walked by with building excitement of their future.

Four of the five schools were ready for prospective students.  They had information, brochures and eagerly answered our questions or pointed us to the detailed information on their website.  But one of the schools taught me much about the importance of guest services and first impressions.

While (based on the number of representatives for their school) they were the best represented school at the fair, they were the worst first impressions of any school we talked to.  Representatives were playing or working on their iPads.  Others were talking to each other as student upon student walked by trying to get information.

This was a great opportunity to impact people’s future, but what a disappointment for my family as we experienced a poor first impression.  One representative, without standing up or putting down her iPad, pointed us to the next table.  The next person said “We are out of brochures, you can just go on-line.”  The third person we talked to from this university told us he knew nothing about our potential major.  Finally we found a fourth representative whom we talked to and he was able to answer our questions.   We had to talk to four representatives, the first three did not even introduced us to the next representative.  By the time we had found our answers we had decided this would not be the school of our choice.  (They are a large school so they won’t miss us.)

But the lessons for you and I are:

1. Do your Guest Services have the answer to the questions people are asking?

2. Do your volunteers put down their iPad or phones and watch for inquiring guests?

3. Do you notice your volunteers talking more to each other than to the guests?

4. Do your volunteers introduce the guest to others?  Especially when trying to find out more information?

Take a lesson from our universities, first impressions are important!

2 Foundations for 5 Actions

Last week’s blog post “5 Actions to Increase Commitment” surfaced a lot of discussion. Many of you realized the foundations that were required to make these work. Some may have missed the foundational elements that were assumed in this blog.  So here are the two foundational elements that are crucial to increasing commitment.

1. Relationship:  what we do as Small Group leaders (whether on or off campus) sets the example for everyone else.  This does not require you to be perfect, live a ‘holier-than-thou’ lifestyle.  The first foundational element just expects you to be a caring human being who takes the time to get to know the individuals in your group.   Take the time before and after the Bible study part of your meeting to get to know people.  Look them in the eye, listen, show interest in what they are saying.  It is not about the material/content/curriculum as much as it is living out what you are studying.  You can’t ask someone to host the next meeting if you don’t know them.  It takes a lot of security for someone to volunteer their home, especially if you ask in the middle of the meeting.  Get to know the people by taking advantage of the ‘before & after’ times of your gathering to chat with individuals.  As Rick Warren says:  People come for content, but stay because of relationships.

2. Prayer:  If we have relationships with those in our group it is much easier to build commitment because we know their interests, hobbies and concerns.  This better enables us to pray for them.  Praying for those in your group by name daily is probably the best foundational element you can add to your daily routine.  By taking a day and pray for an individual in your group you are placing them high on your list of concerns for the day.  As you ask God to bless their life, show you how you can help them and what you need to say to them the next time you see them, you are helping the relationship grow.

Begin today to pray for a member/couple in your small group.  Text, email or call them today to begin to deepen the relationship.